Keeping Perspective

Dating online is different than meeting someone at a bar. That is why you go online, right? Because of the differences, you can't approach online dating with the same game face. Setting your expectations is important to your success as an online dater. Below are the eFlirt expert's thoughts on how to log on with the right mindset.

Throw Your Type Out the Window.  Everyone has a type. Maybe it's the businessman, the overachieving woman or the bad boy. Whatever he or she has resembled in the past, it is time to clean your slate. Your 'type' hasn't worked out very well for you, has it? It is a known fact that people who date online, date outside their type more often. Why? Because what could one simple email, a phone call or a cup of coffee really hurt? Attraction is important and if you're not feeling it, you should definitely stop right where you are. But if there is enough of something there ... just go for it. Try something new.

Email By the Dozen.  Each time you log on, email many matches. Don't get excited about a match until they respond and even still, carry on many conversations with others. There is a whole world wide web out there. Emailing one person and crossing your fingers is not the way to approach online dating. Don't lose out on someone simply because you hit your one email a week quota. Ladies, this means you, too. Yes, you will get more emails than the men without putting forth effort, but resting on your laurels will not make you a successful online dater. Gender roles do not apply as much when you're online. Don't you want a say in who you are dating? Get out there and search your matches regularly.

Don't Get Discouraged.  This is more important than anything ... and the hardest part. So you sent out a couple emails that didn't elicit a response from your match? So what! You didn't know them. They didn't know you. You cannot look at it as a rejection. If you do, you won't last very long dating online. Take each email with a grain of salt. For all you know, your match might be on the brink of a relationship but hasn't taken down his/her profile yet. Also, it is easy to get swept up in a good email convo. If you don't have great chemistry when you meet up, it can be disappointing. Don't get down on yourself. There is a reason you only met for one drink or one cup of coffee. It shouldn't be an enormous loss.

Bottom line? Online dating should be fun but it is definitely about keeping perspective. Do that and you'll rule cyberspace.