Single At 40

By: Laurie Davis, Founder

Your Mamma wasn’t lying when she said “You are the company you keep.” And I’m not just talking about falling in with the crowd who smokes butts every day during gym class — this gem of parental wisdom goes far beyond your high school days. When you’re 40 and the last of the Mohicans of your single friends, it’s relevant all over again.

The most frequent thing my 40+ clients say is: “All of my friends are married with children, so I never meet anyone new.” Luckily, there are tools for your love life to overcome challenges like this — such as online dating. But what you’re really doing when you commit your long weekend to filling out that eHarmony questionnaire is not merely looking for love, but keeping the digital company of the 5,483 other singles within 20 miles of you. Thanks, Mom.

Likewise, you have to get proactive offline. If you stay friends solely with people who already have a ring on it, your chances become stagnant. (After all, I’m sure you’ve already tried going out with your sister’s friend’s workout buddy who turned out to be a 45 year old diva/manboy.)

But before you run out to the closest restaurant bar and attempt to make single friends because I said so, consider that putting yourself in the company of other singles isn’t about forced friendships — it’s about lifestyle. What does yours look like? Think of your interests and how you could be exploring that more to enhance your lifestyle. If good food is a passion, you can get into the foodie scene in your city, take a cooking class, go to a wine tasting or attend a restaurant opening. If you love to give back, go to your alumni association’s gala, volunteer your time for a good cause or commit to Walk For Hunger. The richer your lifestyle, the more singles you’ll naturally befriend and the more expansive your dating life will become.

You might meet the love of your life on eHarmony or you might meet them at the Veuve Clicquot Polo Event. Putting both on your to do list means you’re closer to your last first date.