Sunglasses Guide to Mr. Right ... and Mr. Wrong

By: Amy Spiezio, Guest Blogger

Sunglasses are a go-to fashion accessory. And the right man in the right sunglass is a beauty to enjoy for at least a long weekend at the beach. But the wrong one will have you wishing for a fist-pump to the head. Here's the guide to choosing your summer fling by his sunglasses.

Baby Blue. The blue-lens sunglass wearing pirates/bad boys/bachelors such as Bradley Cooper and Johnny Depp are allowed to wear pretty much whatever they want, wherever they want. Dating them can be exciting. You might end up at “his place,” and it may end up being a random stranger’s home selected by alien guidance or it might be his ISLAND! This is a risk. If you have bail money and a need for an awesome cocktail hour story, give it a shot.

The Aviator. During the day, these Top Gun shades are a timeless classic. Worn at night, not so much. While Brad Pitt might pull it off, pretty much no one else in the world needs to wear aviators 24/7. Sure, we all want to date pilots. But the ever-present sunnies are NOT the best ticket to the mile high club.

Supa Geek! His glasses go from dark to light and light to dark. It’s an eyeglasses/sunglass look that appeals to geeks, nerds, and tech heads. Translation: Men with funds. Men who may not always date, but when they do, it’s likely to be deluxe. Do you think Melinda Gates cries herself to sleep on her billion-dollar pillow every night because Bill’s not wearing the coolest sunglasses in town? I don’t think so.

Faux Celeb Syndrome. This is very coastal. If you’re in L.A. or Vegas or some other point west, oversized uberman sunglasses worn around the clock might be acceptable. Maybe. But if you’re on the East Coast, that’s not hot. Except at the most Eurotrash Miami spot. Which is the stuff of another column entirely, girl. Just say no.

The Novelty Act.
Shutter frames, super sparkly looks, and any sort of extra freaky sunglasses: You don’t want this man. If his sunglasses make people passing by shake their heads in confusion and amusement, it’s not good. Unless you’re really into prop acts. In which case, take in a Carrot Top
show and enjoy the magic.

Amy Spiezio is a magazine writer, editor, and blogger on the prowl in the Philly suburbs. Her sunglass blog, is kicking off another season of the best and worst of sunglasses on the market. When she's not checking out specs, she's looking for domestic bliss and building her multi-media empire as the Spinstermiss.