By Kevin Murray, Suave Scribe
Last week we talked about the gals; this week, it’s onto the guys. As previously mentioned, there are two first impressions in the realm of online dating: one is what you see in someone’s profile, and the second is when you meet face-to-face. But remember — what you do when you hang out with your online crush for the first time can have serious repercussions. Guys, make sure you avoid the following if you want your initial rendezvous to lead to a second date.
1. Dressing As If You’re With the Guys. You don’t have to treat a first night out like you’re auditioning for the cover of GQ, but you also don’t want to look like you’re going out to crush beers and make bad decisions with your bros. Your attire should lie somewhere in-between dressy and casual — depending on the location, of course. You want the woman you’re with to see you can clean up well. You certainly don’t want her to keep her distance due to raggedy threads.
2. Being Cocky. Confidence is important. But too much of it can make you appear smug and arrogant. Women don’t want to be treated like they’re beneath you, like they should be satisfied just being in your mere presence; it’s not a good approach — or a good look. Make sure you have a slice of humble pie before going out. No woman likes a conceited guy.
3. Making Direct Sexual Comments. If you come right out of the gate and make inappropriate jokes, you’ll find your night will end awkwardly with a pat on the back and an ass-out hug. There are plenty of other ways to let a woman know you’re attracted to her. A simple, “You look great tonight” does just fine. Phrases like, “Your ass looks tight in those jeans” is not the approach to take. However, sexual innuendos are OK — only as long as they flow naturally in conversation and you’re witty enough for wordplay. (That’s what she said.)
4. Dominating the Conversation. No one likes awkward silence, but avoid overcompensating by becoming an over-talker. Whether it’s because you’re trying to fill that soundless void with anything or are simply in love with the sound of your own voice, make sure you take conversational turns. Give her time to reply after you speak, and make sure you ask questions about what she says! It shows you’re listening and builds good rapport.
5. Having Bad Table Manners. Males sometimes indulge in acting like cavemen, or drinking beer like Frank the Tank, but let’s try and keep your alter ego under wraps. You don’t want to act so repulsive that she can’t wait to get away from you. And definitely don’t drink to the point where you can’t recall your conversation. Bottom line: if this is a gal you’re trying to impress, put your best foot forward. Keep booze intake to a minimum to assure you don’t get eliminated from her contacts for being a slob.
These are basic guidelines to go by on a first night out. Some points may be obvious, but reminders never hurt. Nerves on a first date can contribute to breaking the aforementioned top 5, but just keep it simple, be yourself, and let your personality shine! The rest will take care of itself.
Did we miss one of your top 5 don’ts for men? Let us know in a comment below!