By Kevin Murray, Suave Scribe
There are two first impressions in the realm of online dating: one is what you see in someone’s profile, and the second is when you meet face-to-face. But let’s face it — what you do when you hang out with your online crush for the first time can have serious repercussions. Ladies, avoid the following if you want your initial rendezvous to lead to a second date.
1. Texting. Put the phone down! It’s OK if you don’t respond to a text message ASAP — your date should have your undivided attention. Looking down and typing on a phone is a sure way to crush the momentum of any conversation. Just like you should never text and drive, you also shouldn’t text and date. Keep your eyes on the “road” if you want to travel to date number two. Cell phones are distracting, and texting gives the impression that you’re uninterested in what the other person has to say.
2. Getting Too Drunk. Nerves can influence the need to ease tension by consuming alcohol. While a few drinks is fine, make sure you avoid downing copious amounts of martinis to calm first-date jitters. Getting a serious buzz can be a real buzz kill. What’s more is that you don’t want the room to spin when you’re trying to pontificate your life story to someone — it’ll be kind of hard to concentrate on what you’re saying if you’re going cross-eyed.
3. Talking About an Ex. Sometimes, even though you should definitely avoid it, your date might ask about past relationships. If so, address the topic in a lighthearted way — there’s no need to get into detail on why an old flame burned out. And you should especially avoid bringing up ex talk continuously. You want the person sitting across from you to learn about you, the individual, not you, part of a former union. There will be plenty time in the future (if your early dates go well) to bring up old baggage; just make sure the majority of that baggage stays in storage during your first time out with someone new.
4. Displaying Closed-off Body Language. Body language that closes you off from others (i.e. crossing your arms or leaning away from someone) gives people the impression that you’re uncomfortable. To avoid this, leave your arms at your sides or use hand gestures while talking, or slightly lean in when your date is speaking. Of course, smile and give off positive energy! Even if your negative body language is unintentional, it can still send a subconscious message that you’re not happy.
5. Getting Hot and Heavy. Many think going home with someone on a first date is a cardinal sin, but it’s not always the case. Many women think, “If I sleep with him right away he’ll think I’m a slut.” But if the date was great and there’s obvious (and mutual) appeal, then by all means see where it goes (as long as you’re both in the right mindset and are comfortable with the situation). Chemistry is a powerful key to a strong relationship, and figuring out the barometer of your physical attraction to each other early on shouldn’t always be looked at as a bad thing.
Did we miss a first date no-no for women? Let us know below!