Avoiding the “Interview” Date
By: Samantha Eng, Copy Cutie
One advantage to dating online is that the power lies in the eye of the beholder. Before even the first meeting, you can search for your match according to your preferences and avoid compromising on non-negotiables, keeping your relationship wants and needs in perspective. But be wary when the “online crazies” take a new form during the initial meet. It’s easy to fall prey to sizing up your potential mate to see if you’ll spawn the perfect offspring — after all, receding hairlines are easily avoidable, lest you meet someone offline with a measuring tape. So to avoid making your date feel like he or she is on an interview to play the role of your perfect mate, take these few suggestions into consideration.
While posture and poise convey attentiveness during an interview, a date can (and will) easily see through the stiffness. If you’re really interested, here are a couple of key body signals to show it:
- Angle your body towards the person
- Close the margin of physical space between you
- Time your touch according to the conversation
Expect a thank you if your body language reflects interest, no matter how subtle it may be — after all, it’s an interview must!
When it comes down to it, dates are a chance to get to know someone and see if there’s potential for a future relationship. Instead of firing off questions and satisfying your curiosity, ask yourself the legendary question Mia Wallace (Uma Thurman) asked Vincent Vega (John Travolta) in Pulp Fiction: “Do you listen, or do you wait to talk?”
Listening and responding to what’s being said shows you’re truly engrossed in what the person is saying. By responding, you’re building a connection. Hopefully, your date will show you the same courtesy!
Engaging in meaningful conversation is just one small step outside of the interview box that will hopefully lead you towards the road to a successful date.
To ensure there aren’t any dating disasters, give your new offline match a personal touch. While we censor ourselves during interviews, be candid and personal. Give that person something to walk away with that shows them you’re special — and a true catch. You might just land yourself a second date!
What are your tips for avoiding the Interview Date? Tell us your savvy skills!