By: Liz, Social Media Manager for We Love Dates
As the editor of a dating blog, I've written my fair share of articles about the mistakes one shouldn’t make on a first date. While you should never get wasted or reminisce about your ex, sometimes, making a “mistake” is the best thing you can do. Love doesn't always play by the rules, so why should we? Here are five common first date mistakes that us gals should make — at least once!
1. Agree to a last-minute date. If a guy asks you to dinner at 5 p.m., we’re taught to decline; heaven forbid we appear too available. If the only plans you have include frozen yogurt and watching ‘The Bachelorette,’ you aren’t doing yourself any favors. Face it: if you have a profile up on an online dating site, guess what? You're available. While I'm not suggesting you drop all your plans to go out with someone who barely gave you notice, I am saying that by saying no just to say no, you’re possibly missing out on an exciting night.
2. Act too interested. So you're sitting across from a guy you really like, the evening is going magically and you're connecting on so many levels ... but you better not show how much you like him, right? Wrong! If you're having a great time, tell him! If he says he can't wait to see you again, say “Me too,” and smile. As long as you aren't throwing yourself at him and are keeping your expectations in check, it's OK to be vulnerable and open if you feel there’s a true connection.
3. Go home with him. This isn't so much for first dates as it is for second or third dates. There's a difference between going home with a guy (or inviting him to yours) and sleeping with him. If the restaurant you two are at is closing and you don't want the night to end, going home with someone you trust and having a glass of wine, checking out his pad, or just keeping the conversation flowing for another hour isn't always a mistake. Note — use your judgment and remember to be safe. Safety is no mistake.
4. Bring up politics or religion. These discussions can be polarizing. What if we don't believe in the same things? What if we see the world differently? We're afraid we'll scare him off (or vice versa), and prefer to keep the first date convo as close to surface level as possible. While these subjects can divide you, they can also bring you together and bond you, based on things that actually matter. Sure, you might share a love for enchiladas and Dave Matthews Band, but will that sustain you? No. But sharing a common outlook on life will. Be open, never judgmental, and don't be afraid to share the things that make you, you.
5. Be upfront about exactly what you want. Stage 5 Clinger, needy, etc. Call it what you will, women who voice what they’re looking often get a negative reputation. We're taught to tiptoe around and pretend we're on a first date simply for the food and company, nothing more. Women are dating for a reason, whether it’s to find a cuddle buddy or a husband. If you’re looking for something serious, it's OK to say so. Not only will it weed out the men who aren't on the same page as you, but it’ll prevent you from wasting any time with a guy who doesn’t know if he can give you what you want and need.
Ladies, which of these first date mistakes have you made in the past? Share with us below!
Liz is the social media manager for We Love Dates, a worldwide online dating site. She also maintains their popular We Love Dates blog. When she's not writing or tweeting about all things dating, you can find her exploring Los Angeles, traveling around the world, and spending far too much money on shoes.