Why You Should Take the Highroad When Your Relationship Ends

By Kevin Murray, Suave Scribe

credit: Ann Baekken (Flickr)The easiest thing to do when a relationship ends is blame the other person — for everything. But why do we do this? 

It’s pretty simple: Devaluing someone (at least in our mind) is the way to get over them (even though deep down we’re hurt). We often yell and text mean things on our way out the relationship door. But honestly? That’s the worst thing to do. Here’s why:

Timing. Poor timing can ruin a relationship. How many people have you tried dating but your lifestyles didn’t match? Events in a person’s life can change year-to-year, month-to-month — you could be meant for each other, just not right now.

Perceptions change.  She loves me, she loves me not. People can be hot and cold. Yes, it’s incredibly frustrating, but that’s dating. Someone who once felt like the wrong puzzle piece, now seemingly fits snug like a glove. And over time, perceptions can change as individuals become more aware of themselves and what’s important in their lives.

Losing graciously is admirable.  You can’t win them all. Chances are, you went through a breakup before. Sure, some are a lot harder to take than others. Assuming your now ex didn’t do anything egregious (like cheat on you), the best thing to do is have a civil conversation about it. Bite your tongue on the way out — you’ll respect each other more in the long run.

Word of mouth.  People love to vent about exes. If you act like a jerk during your relationship’s demise, there’s a strong chance word will get out. Rumors can spread about how poorly you handled things, and no one wants his or her dirty laundry on display for the whole town to see.

Never kill an option.  Take all of the aforementioned things into account and you could find yourself in a position to want to date this person again — you never know what can happen. Things might change and the both of you may realize you’re meant to be after all.

 Have any tips to taking the highroad? Add a comment below.