Top 5 Ways to Secure a Second Date

By Alyssa Fleisher, Copy Cutie

You’re on the perfect first date and the two of you are having a blast. At least, that’s how you feel. But how can you be sure your date feels the same way? Why, getting yourself a second date, of course! However, let’s not get ahead of ourselves. In order to get to numero two, you’ll need to ensure the first night ends smoothly. Here are a few tips to keep in the back of your mind if you’re hoping to go out with a match again.

1. In Your Eyes.  Eye contact, eye contact, eye contact! Ladies, you can rule the world with just the right bat of the eye. If you really want to pique someone’s interest, all it takes is a glance, a quick look down, and then right back in for the kill with a lingering gaze. For all intensive purposes, let’s call it the quick, quick, slow. As for the gentlemen, keep in mind that women like a man who listens. The best way to look interested is by keeping eye contact during your conversation — and tone down the creepy scale. If you’re truly in tune, then you’re probably already maintaining good eye contact. Just remember — eyes front!

2. Rock Your Body.  If you’re interested in someone, would you stand 12 feet away from him or her? No! You’ll want to be as close to your date as possible without freaking him or her out. Body language is one of the best ways to make a good impression. Some tips include facing each other during conversation, not crossing your arms, subtle mirroring of each other’s body language. Ladies, feel free to give a light touch on the arm when you’re laughing at a joke — good or bad. Fellas, don’t be afraid to reach for the small of her back when escorting her out of your venue or while you’re moving forward in a ticket line. However, remember to read each other’s signals; you don’t want to make your date uncomfortable.

3. Love Shack. You already know that you and your date have some compatibility after finding each other online. Talk about bars or restaurants that you’ve been to that the other person hasn’t seen yet, or casually mention places that you’ve both been dying to check out, like a wine tasting downtown. Then say that one day you’d like to head there for dinner or drinks in the future and see how your date responds. You never know … these places may turn into your new go-to spots together!

4. My First Kiss (Went A Little Like This).  If there’s a mutual spark between you two then go for it. A great kiss can leave the other person thinking about you — and only you — until they see you again. If that’s not incentive for leaning in, we don’t know what is! However (and this is a big one), always leave them wanting more. Dating is a marathon, not a sprint; one kiss is all you need to end on a high note. Who knows — it just may be your last first kiss! 

5. Glad You Came.  The day after your night out, thank your date for the lovely evening via call or text. If you’re feeling bold, mention a fun event concerning a common interest (like that wine tasting we mentioned) and ask if he or she would like to join you. If that’s too much, simply ask when you’re seeing him or her next. If the person declines, at least you know you tried instead of wondering “what if” for the rest of your life. At the very best, you’ll find yourself on your way to your second date. And hopefully, the third will come naturally!

Did we miss any good tips? Share some of your tips to securing a second date below!

Spring Cleaning Your Online Dating Inbox

By Paola Hernandez, Copy Cutie

With April showers (hopefully) bringing in May flowers, spring’s in full swing. Along with warmer temps and cherry blossom season, it’s time to go out with the old and in with the new. Most people do spring cleaning to rid themselves of the junk in their lives. But cleaning shouldn’t be exclusive to what’s in your house; think of all the web clutter found in your email accounts, on your social media pages and especially, inside your online dating inbox.

If you’re not sure which messages to remove, here are a few tips to help you figure out who to delete out of your digital dating life and who’s worth holding onto — at least, until summer.

Let Bygones Be Bygones.  Holding onto old messages can lead you down the slippery slopes into hoarding. If you haven’t heard from Max123 in five months, there shouldn’t be any reason to keep the 15 messages he sent. If you’re adamant about holding on to particularly funny or sentimental convos, copy and paste them into a Word doc and store ‘em in a separate folder — out of sight, out of mind. While some sites automatically delete emails after a certain amount of time has passed anyway, it’s always good to go through your past message strings and keep your inbox streamlined.

Spring Forward.  Do you keep encountering that creeper who doesn’t understand the meaning of I’m not interested? Take advantage of that little ‘block’ button on a user’s profile. The glorious thing about using this function is that the other party will be none the wiser. Continue to browse and chat with other users without that stage five clinger clogging up your inbox. You always want to save room for your most compatible matches.

Single? Taken? Maybe?  While going through your inbox, it might be worth it to click on old contacts’ profiles. Missypinky83 was definitely up your ally but if it’s been a few weeks since you last heard from her, see if she’s been on recently — or if she’s even still active on the site. Sometimes, keeping messages from certain users indicates that you’re still interested in them, but if it looks like they’ve found their match (or have decided to take a break from dating online), delete their messages and get back on the interweb prowl.

How do you choose which messages to keep in your inbox? Let us know in a comment below!

Don’t Strike Out: How to Date a Die-Hard Sports Fan … of Your Rival Team

By Jessica Hartman, Certified eFlirter

Hi. My name is Jess and I’m a baseball-aholic. But I’m not a fan of just any baseball team — I’m talking about the Tampa Bay Rays. I’m the person who used to live 10 minutes from the stadium and cheered them on when they were the worst team in the league. Call me a bandwagoner and you’ll be lucky if I let you live.

About three years ago I moved smack dab into enemy territory — New York City, also known as Yankee Country. The Rays/Yankees rivalry might not be as well known as the one between the Yanks and the Boston Red Sox, but because they train in Tampa, fellow natives like me feel the same way as those from Massachusetts. So what’s a girl to do? I can’t automatically write off every cute Yankee fan in New York or there wouldn’t be anyone left to date!

While having mutual passion for something like sports is usually a good thing in a relationship, it can turn ugly when competition is thrown in the middle of it. This is a common problem amongst any sport, especially when there’s a fierce rivalry in the same city. Yankees and Mets, Angels and Dodgers, the White Sox and Cubs — can’t we all just get along? Here are a few tips to keeping the peace during the season:

Keep competition friendly — really.  It’s perfectly fine to take a few digs at each other. Remember those playground days when you used to pick on the boy or girl you had a crush on? This is a similar field. Playful trash talk is a great way to flirt. Just be careful not to cross the line.

Watch what you drink.  Beer and sports go hand in hand, but a few too many drinks can turn good-humored jabs into a serious fight faster than you can say, “You’re out!” Stick to two or three drinks per game to be safe.

Know when to shut up.  Watch for signs that your partner is getting legitimately annoyed. Red flags include sudden silent treatment, refusal to reciprocate trash talk and looking away. Sports fans are passionate about their teams and if you’ve crossed a line, it’s time to be quiet — even if you don’t think you’ve done anything wrong.

Place fun bets.  “Loser buys dessert” and other exciting wagers can make the loss a little easier to swallow. Winner, listen up — it’s fine to gloat a little, but make sure to be genuinely thankful when your date (aka ‘the loser’) makes good on his or her bet.

Be a good sport.  It’s never fun when your team loses, but remember: there’s always the next game — or at the worst, next year. It’s not the end of the world; don’t take it out on your significant other.

Finally, here’s one last tip for the ultimate challenge in a couple’s dating life — the playoff game when your favorite teams verse each other:

Space is OK.  If you’re both truly hard core fans and your teams are facing off in a playoff game, it might be a good idea to watch it separately. Seriously. This doesn’t mean anything is wrong with your relationship; it just means you’re taking precautions and preventing an ugly situation. That way you can yell, curse and gloat during the game with your fellow fans without having to worry about offending your partner, which you surely will. Just make sure to do something extra special for whoever loses.

Have other tips for fellow sport rival lovers? Share below! 

How To Be a Serial Dater

The Odds of Playing Multiples in Dating Roulette

By: Samantha Eng, Copy Cutie

Some say the foundation of dating has radically evolved over the years. From arranged marriages and chaperoned strolls to speed dating and online profiles, while the method is different, the end goal remains the same: everlasting love.

What allows us to differentiate ourselves in the digital age is our ability to play the game of Love Life. Though parents and hierarchy used to create couplings, nowadays we have the opportunity to place our own bets.

As any high roller will tell you, it’s a numbers game out there — and a serial dater will agree.

Play The Odds.

For one month, aim to go on a date with one person a week. Given that it’s a different person each time, that’s four chances of finding “The One.” If you were to up that to two people weekly, you double your chances.

A serial dater knows that increasing the number of those in his or her dating rotation will increase the odds, not only because of the act of dating itself, but because of the domino effect of networking. Ever hear of six degrees of separation? We’re all connected somehow, so the more you connect, the higher your chances!

Fill Your Race Card.

A horse race card contains details about the horse race, like the number of races, names of the horses, etc. A serial dater will collect as many race cards as possible. Don’t expect him or her to put their eggs in one basket — the odds won’t always be in their favor. There’s a 50/50 chance of denial and no one likes rejection!

But what a serial dater knows best is that by looking at the stats, they can make an educated guess when betting on the right horse … err, person. And that way, they’re prepared for the ultimate gamble.

Go All In.

A seasoned poker player might be able to keep a straight face, but like anyone proposing (or receiving a proposal) there’s no denying a racing heart. By playing the odds and filling a race card, a serial dater has the undeniable advantage in the dating field. He or she has figured out exactly what they want and the person who they want to be with: a safe, long term bet that they’re willing to go all in for.

From Fail to Fab: Rescheduling a Date

By: Jess Downey, Copy Cutie

Fail: A few months ago I planned a date with a guy from an online dating site and we exchanged numbers “just in case.” When date day rolled around he texted, saying something came up and he wouldn’t make it. While I was disappointed, I understood and told him it was fine, offering some other free dates to reschedule. Since he wasn’t sure when he’d be free, he wanted to play it by ear. I was less than enthused with that idea and tried casually nudging him to lock down a date. Again, he played the “I’m not sure” card. After some debate, he finally said, “Let’s just say Thursday for now.” But when Thursday came around, it was the same story. We again went back and forth until I finally told him I’d pass.

Fab: We’ve all been there — you have a date coming up and something tragic comes along and throws a rift in your plans. When reasoning is legitimate, it’s perfectly acceptable to postpone for another time. But it’s easy to turn an attempt at rescheduling into an obvious declaration of “not interested.”

Avoid phrases like, “Let’s plan something next week” or “Let’s play it by ear.” And definitely prevent making your date beg for a plan. When you’re vague and give an indefinite day, you’re really just saying you aren’t all that into him or her or are simply keeping this person on the back burner, just in case. If you’re truly interested, that’s not the impression you want to give.

Instead, lead with a polite apology. You don’t need to grovel but show some compassion for the situation. Then suggest an alternative date — one that’s definitely doable, even if it’s not until the following week. This shows that you not only feel bad about having to rain check but really do want to see the person.

Be mindful of the person’s schedule. Don’t be irritated if your date isn’t free on the day you suggest. He or she might have already rearranged other things to plan the first date, so be prepared to possibly juggle things around your own schedule. 

Remember: Sometimes life throws you a curve ball, but make sure you’re aiming to hit a homerun and head on a date rather than foul out and sit bench side.