Dealing With Your Summer Fling


By: Thomas Edwards, Founder of The Professional Wingman

Summer is winding down, the sun is setting earlier and the weather is getting cooler. On top of that, your summer fling may be coming to an end. Some of you might be excited while others are hoping the fling can continue into the fall season. No matter the case, follow my summer fling etiquette.

From Fling to Zilch:

Actions speak louder than words and winding things down with your summer fling is no different. Chances are your fling is also wondering what will happen come September, so it’s important to put some things in motion.

  • Start off by distancing yourself time-wise. Shifting your priorities and spending less time together --especially on the weekend days which are considered the most valuable days of the week for singles -- will send a clear signal.
  • Tone down the communication. And when you do chat or text, keep things on a friendlier level and do your best to avoid flirting. Initiating less will help you avoid mixed signal syndrome.
  • If you’re just no longer interested in dating them, the simpler solution would be to start dating other people. Filling up your schedule with dates will inevitably mean you have less time for your fling.
  • And of course there will be a time where they will wonder what’s going on. If they don’t read your actions well, THEN it’s time to reinforce them with words. Be honest, direct and commit to what you’re saying, despite their attempts to get you back.

From Fling to Relationship:

Your advice is much easier.

  • Simply keep doing what you’re doing. And more importantly, make plans for the future. Don’t just talk about Labor Day plans, but  Columbus Day weekend as well (the next major holiday). Trust me, your fling will realize it’s not just a fling.
  • And then, go out -- on real dates, not just “stay-at-home” activities. While staying in is fun and intimate, now is the most important time to show you really want to keep things going.
  • Enjoy the fall together with apple picking, park tours (seeing the leaves change color), pumpkin carving, vineyard tours -- the list can go on.

In the end, stay active, keep up the momentum and save the indoor chemistry for when it will really count.

Thomas Edwards is the founder of The Professional Wingman. Deemed the real-life "Hitch,” Thomas helps singles find relationships and lead fulfilling lives through personal development. His unique approach focuses on dating strategy and lifestyle development. Thomas has been featured in Cosmopolitan, Fox Business, CNN, The Wall Street Journal, Ebony Magazine and many more.