Fail to Fab: Social Media When You’ve Made It Official
By: Jess Downey, Copy Cutie
We’ve shown you how to flirt on Twitter and clued you in on when to friend your match on Facebook, but when things turn towards something serious, the rest of social media is a whole other ball game. Here’s a special Fail to Fab series all about tackling the various other apps you’re using on your smartphone during each stage of a relationship.
Fail: A friend of mine met a guy from an online dating site some time ago. After seeing each other for a few months, they became boyfriend and girlfriend. She immediately made things FBO (Facebook Official) and would regularly post updates about their dates’ little details — while they were happening. And one night, while she was in the middle of gushing about him on Facebook, her new boo made a snide comment about her social media sharing that led to a huge blowout fight in the middle of the restaurant.
Fab: New relationships are exciting and it’s easy to want to tell the whole world what’s happening. Just keep in mind that there’s a time and a place for everything. Make sure you’re focusing on your new relationship and not only your status updates.
There truly are some things that should stay between couples. It’s OK to update your status on Facebook occasionally, but don’t go overboard. If your new guy or gal does something especially romantic, like bring you flowers, Instagram a swoon-worthy picture — but leave it at that. Your friends and followers will appreciate it just as much as your new boo.
And always be mindful of your setting. Social media screams anything but romantic at a cozy wine bar, but is totally fine if you’re at a sports bar or on an outing with a large group. Just make sure you’re still paying attention to what’s happening around you.
When it comes to making things official, talk about it first before changing your relationship status on your smart phone. New pairings tend to be fragile since you’re still figuring things out. And keep in mind that you want your new guy or gal to feel special, rather than just something you can boast about all over the Internet.
If you’re dating a social media over-sharer, talk to him or her about it. Approach the conversation lightly and explain why it bothers you. Holding it in — or being too harsh — will only cause a huge misunderstanding; one that could damage your relationship.
Remember: While it’s easy to feel like you’re in your own little world, anyone (and everyone) has access to social media. You might be the person who likes to update your status whenever something happens, but be mindful that dating involves another person, too. There are some things about relationships that should really just stay between those involved.