Online Dating Déjà Vu
By Paola Hernandez, Copy Cutie
Finding your true love online can sometimes be difficult, especially when the virtual fishes aren’t biting. And sometimes, you’ll run into the problem of getting messages from the same person on different sites. But what happens when you receive a ping from a former flame? Since you two have already met offline it’s clear things didn’t work out before (at least, not on your end).
If you need help handle someone you’ve already met, here are some general rules to follow before making your next move.
Don’t Funk With My Heart.
Fool me once, shame on you; fool me twice, shame on me! There can be many reasons why you and this person lost communication after meeting on cyberspace and in person. Whether it was a mutual decision or the person just wasn’t the one for you, never forget your reason. Why waste time with someone you didn’t have a connection with the first time around? However, if the reason was because you both just lost touch, reignite the flame — but only if you want to, and feel comfortable. Giving someone a second chance can do you both some good.
Read Between the Lines.
Believe it or not, the content of your email can subconsciously spell out the intentions of the sender. Generic, template-sounding messages might indicate that they don’t remember you, especially if it’s been a while since you met. Don’t be offended; it can be hard for people to keep track, especially when matches update their profile photos (which is what you should be doing anyway!). But if you happen to get a detailed message about rekindling your romance, take time to consider your response (if you choose to answer back at all). Just keep in mind that if if jskater87 or cupcakegal truly mean what they say, they might continue to reach out until they hear from you.
All About the Details.
Make sure you scope all the deets from someone’s profile to see if anything’s changed. It might be the case where when you first spoke he or she wasn’t interested in a long-term thing, but now they are. By investigating the changes, you can decide whether or not they are worth replying back to. A minor change in someone’s digital story might sweep you off of your feet this time around. Do some research and think this one through!
It’s easy for people to go with the familiar — whether it was good or bad. Take all the factors about your former flame into account before pressing the reply button. The last thing you want to do is make the same mistake twice.
Have you ever had an awkward encounter with a former crush from the digital world? Share in a comment below!