Four Questions You Don't Need the Answers To
By Amanda Rodriguez, Copy Cutie
When beginning a relationship, it can feel impossible not to explore every inch of the person who has captured your attention. Obviously, you should ask questions that will incline them to offer a deeper understanding of who they are; however, there are some things you just should not ask. Certain questions will only upset your new partner, and the answers may send you running. Here are a few classic questions to avoid asking, at least in the beginning.
“When was the last time you had sex?”
Ladies especially, spare yourself the disappointment and do NOT ask questions which you truly do not want the answer to. Men have been known to have a much higher inclination to have sex without a relationship. If your ultimate goal is to last with the person you’re thinking of asking, you shouldn’t ask. Reality is, your potential partner could say, “Uh...it’s been a while…Like 10 days,” and you’d be slightly distraught; especially if you’ve been seeing one another for longer than that. Avoid being upset by steering clear of that question.
“How many people have you slept with?”
This one goes out to everyone, and the advice is the same. The person you are dating will always have a preconceived notion of what you are like sexually based off the impression you’ve given. Being honest in this area can be a make or break situation. You say too little, and they’re worried you can’t deliver. You say too many, and they’re either disgusted or worried everyone has had a piece of you. Even if their answer is up to par with your standards, you may not want that question asked of you. Keep an old-fashioned ideology when it comes to this question: less is more. The less you reveal, the more they want to know.
“How do you feel about marriage?”
I will warn you now, stay away from putting this question out in the air too early. No new relationship should even fathom the idea of marriage. This question has a time and place that make it acceptable. There’s no need to rush the wedding conversation, so just enjoy the relationship you have now. You do not want to scare your potential partner out of committing to you. Let each commitment flow naturally and see where the current takes you both.
“Have you ever cheated?”
On a personal note, while I have come back from answering this question, not everyone knows how to do so. Take into consideration that if your partner answers this question too early, it can feed the insecurity in a brand new relationship. Asking this question is going to put cracks that you don’t need in the foundation you’re hoping to build. No one can build a steady wall on a downhill slant. Wait a couple months before asking this question. It can mean the end before you get to appreciate the beginning.
While there are certainly more questions that one should avoid asking too early, it is always beneficial to avoid these four zingers. If you’re contemplating whether you should ask a question or not, think of how you would feel if the response is something cannot handle. Also, think of how you’d feel if you were asked that question. If the answer is anything negative, don’t ask. It truly is that simple.
What other questions would you avoid asking? Let us know below!